A letter to my boy…

[photo credit: Agape Photography]

Dear Huck,

Let me start off by saying that I love you. So, so much. And I cannot imagine not having you in our lives. But you, my boy…You are a fussy one. You are a bit (okay, a lot) high maintenance and you test our patience every day with your grunts, groans, cries, and apparent ability to function on minimal sleep.

There have been times that I have caught myself wishing for time to go faster, just for a few weeks at a time. For you to outgrow this season of whines and cries. For you to be more comfortable; more content on this side of the world.

And then there are the other times… The times when you smirk at me and “talk” with your precious baby talk and the dimple on your right cheek reveals itself. Oh, how that perfect little dimple makes me melt. (I have a feeling a lot of girls will be saying that about you someday).

Or the times when you finally fall asleep after fighting rest for hours and I am reminded of how perfectly your head fits in the nape of my neck, as if if was always meant to fill that space.

There are times like the other night, as we sat in the dark in our snowed in house, and your little hands suddenly didn’t seem quite so little anymore. These times slap me in the face and snap me back to reality.

They remind me that someday, your hands won’t reach to grab mine anymore as you lay sound asleep on my chest. Someday your hands will reach for a hockey stick instead of reaching to clutch your fuzzy blue blankie tighter. Someday your hands will reach for a diploma. They will reach for another girl’s hand (when you’re 30). Someday those same tiny hands that I held during your first seconds in this world will reach for your own baby’s hands.

Time will fly right before my eyes and these moments will turn to memories in a blink.

So even if it seems like my entire day is spent feeding you and consoling you; even if I am tired and feeling like I am nearing the end of my rope; even if our moments are mainly spent rocking and bouncing up and down in attempt to keep you content; I will forever cherish this season. These moments are precious, they are fleeting, and they are ours – and only ours – to share.

Thank you for showing me that we both have a whole lot of growing yet to do.

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